Why Bitches Are hot but a Pain in the Ass

Note that I have no idea why i'm writing this but it's just that my blog really need some updating.

So why are bitches are such a pain on the butt?
My friend,Hiikari or whatever her name is,told me that bitches always do what they want to do.
Is it true?
Well through my life experiences,I think im gonna have to agree with Hiikari.

Well some people think that bitches are like....Robots lol.
I must admit I like bitches myself,their hot,their skanky,their horny, and would totally get laid with every guys at every corner.

Like Paris Hilton.
WOOOO THIS IS ONE NASTAY LIL BITCH.
So why does everyone says that Paris is quite of a bitch fit?
Well I did some research on google and stuff.
Most of her schoolmates says that she turns out to be quite a bully.
Well you don't need to wonder why.She's spoiled =o!

One more thing about chicks like Paris Hilton, they always think their a goody-goody.
I mean,what the hell?Paris Hilton went for acting?THEN SINGING?AH MAN SHE SOUNDED LIKE A HIPPO GETTING SQUEAZED BY AN ANACONDA.
Well she thinks she's good at acting. I remember the time when I watched one of her movies,''The House Of Wax'', well her character in the movie is like...a whore lol.
She makes out with this black dude or something inside a tent. She's also acting as a bitch.
It's more like ''The House For Sex'' to her than ''The House of Wax''.
I also remember the time when she said ''Oh I'm going to win Oscar Awards and im a better actor than Gwyneth Peltrow''.

Lol,bitch please.Look yourself up a mirror =) Gwyneth has won a lot more oscars than you.
How much have you won?Yeah...NONE.Gwyneth is also hotter than you :P.

Well i'd love to chat more about bitches.But I think I need to save the rest for the last.
Thank you for wasting your time reading this stupid blog lol.

And here's a word of advice to all you girls out there :)


DONT
BE
A
BITCH
LOLOLOLAOAOLAOALOALAOAL.

So why are bitches such a pain up the butthole?

BECAUSE THEY DRIVE US INSANE!

Chapter Six:Misunderstanding

Back to our handsome,buffed and macho hero.

Who is about to....

RUMBLE!

The beasts unties Akram and brought him into the arena.

The Hairy Chief(Akmal) took out two spears and gave one to Akram so that it would be a fair fight.Other beasts are gathering around the arena,jumping and screaming which sounded like a donkey.

Akmal:Priya ook agh nugam ik!
Akram:I dont know what that means but im gonna KICK YOUR HAIRY ARSE *shows middle finger*

Akmal lunged towards Akram but Akram dives beside and gave him a big smack on the head with the backside of his spear.That dosent seem to affect him.

Akram: What the fuc--?

Akmal gave a single blow at Akram's chest and he nearly flew 6 feet away from Akmal.

Akram:*cough,cough* that was gay *cough*
Akmal: *laughs*

The other beasts was cheering.Akram got up and took up his spear.He threw it towards Akmal but he dodged it like matrix and it hit one of the audience.

Akmal:(WHAT THE FUCK?THAT'S MY GRANDMOTHER!NOW YOUR GONNA DIE!)

Akmal threw his spear towards Akram too but Akram dodged it as well and the spear hit one of the audience.

Akmal:(Oh my god...I KILLED MY OWN WIFE!)*kneels down and cries with his hands covering his face)

Akram took this chance.He charged towards Akmal and gave him a hard knee-up-to-the-jaw.

Akmal broke a few teeth and spits out blood.Now he was really pissed off.When Akmal was about to attack....

??????: STOP!

It grew quiet and both of them stopped fighting.Akram was surprised when he saw Nizar and Faiz behind a pale transparent looking man...who is floating on mid-air.

Faiz: Why the hell did you shout for?I WAS ENJOYING THE SHOW!
Rafaee:Yeah and watch your friend's balls get ripped?I dont think so.

The whole tribe grew silent and looked towards Rafaee.

Beast 1:(OUR GOD!HE'S BACK!)
Beast 2 :(NOT A MOMENT BUT TOO SOON!)
Rafaee:(You!) *points a finger Akmal*
Akmal:(Please if you would let me expla--)
Rafaee:(I told you there shall be no blood spilling on these grounds.YOU DIRTY CUR!)

Faiz and Nizar helped Akram up.

Faiz:You alright,mate?
Akram:I can manage.Who's that guy?
Nizar: ...Faiz's new pleasure toy..... *sulks*
Faiz:Shut the hell up,dude.
Akram:Whats going on?
Faiz:Nothing.He's just jealous cuz he didnt get penetrated by a rock hard dick.
Nizar:DID NOT!
Faiz:Lies.
Akram:Wtf?

The three heroes looked at Akmal,who is being lectured by Rafaee.They were talking in some weird language.

Faiz:Eh?He was talking english just now.Now he's talking like an indian.
Nizar: ............
Faiz:Omg are you done sulking?
Nizar: ......
Nizar:No.
Faiz:Retard.
Nizar:No your face.
Faiz:Gosh.When are you going to grow up?
Nizar:When are you going to grow a face?
Akram:Enough,you limp dick-fuckups.

Rafaee float towards the three of them.

Rafaee:Korjh poop lista mak na?
Akram:Lol wtf.
Rafaee:Oh sorry.You dont understand that language.Here,let me help.

Rafaee placed his hand on Akram's forehead and a small light appeared on Rafaee's palm.

Faiz & Nizar: Whoaaaaa.

Rafaee pulls back his hand.

Akram:(Aghhh.My head...)
Faiz:What?
Akram:(My head.I feel so dizzy)
Nizar:Dude,you sound like a retard.What the hell are you talking about?

Then,Rafaee did the same to Nizar and Faiz.

Nizar:(HOLY SHIT!IM TALKING LIKE A REAL INDIAN!THIS IS SO COOL!)
Faiz:(I thought you hated Indians.)
Nizar:(Well I do...But--Uhh...Ah to hell with you.)
Akram:(What did you just do?)
Rafaee:(Uhhh....I dont know how to explain it but...Oh you get the point.)
Akram:(Right.Now to have a few words with that big,old ape.)

Akram walks towards Akmal.

Akram:(Oi you hairy furball.Why did you want to fight with me?)
Akmal:(You've invaded our lands.This is our soil.Plus you pissed on our ancestors grave.)
Akram:(Pissed on your-- WHAT?I never did that,you fool.)
Akmal:(But that guy said--)

They both notices that Azlan has disappeared.

Akmal:(Wtf.)
Akram:(Oh I see.That guy must've told you that i've done bad things,right?)
Akmal:(Yes,you could say that.)
Akram:(God.If i ever see that guy again im gonna--)
Akmal:(Yeah yeah whatever.I bet you must be thirsty.)
Faiz:(Hungry too.)
Akmal:(Yeah that too.Come to my house and dine with me)
Akram,Nizar & Faiz:Sweet.



To be continued....

Randomness.

Hello everyone,I am Akram,the greatest comedian-genius to ever walk this earth.

I write this blog to you not as a God or an International Celebrity,but both.

And yes,Americans are extremely obese and ugly.

Because their nation is responsible for the deaths of millions of innocent people,I am indeed better.

Eventhough they build sub-part cars,I am indeed better--

I mean ''We'' Malaysians,are still better.

Much better than all of you unless YOU happen to be a Malaysian reading this and then YOU can post a comment to this blog or other blogs that we are better than everyone else as well.

Regardless,I have taken the time of my wholesome and superior Malaysian life to make a formal ''Go fuck yourself'' to other Country.

Be proud that your a Malaysian.

Other than that,

Due to a screwed up storyline,I am now going to stop making stories of our three hot & sexy heroes(unless if i change my mind.)

P.S

My blog owns others.

Chapter Five:The Homosexual Ghost

On the other side of the village.

Faiz:*wakes up* Ahh what the fuuckk...My heaaaddddd.
Nizar:Finally you woke up.It's been an hour now.
Faiz:What the fuck?Shiiittt!Im tied up!
Nizar:Yeah I noticed.These guys aint shit,ya dig?
Faiz:I dig,homie.Aight,foo.I need to tell you something very important,aite.
Nizar:What,yo?Wait why the fuck are we talking like this?
Faiz:Im starving.
Nizar:Uh yeah like I never heard that one before.
Nizar:Ah I think I can reach my knife in my sleeve.Just a little more-- YES!GOT IT!
Faiz:Yippee~!Cut loose your rope.After that,help me cut loose mine.
Nizar:Chill.This will only take a few seconds.


Three hours later...

Nizar:DAMN THESE ROPES!
Faiz:FUCKING HURRY UP!
Nizar:*cuts loose* YES!IM FREE!
Faiz:Yeah shut up and untie me.
Nizar:*gets up* Haha adios,sucker.
Faiz:Wait,what the fuck?
Nizar:Na,just messin with ya.

Nizar unties faiz's rope.

Faiz:Lets get the fuck outta here!
Nizar:Yeah lets!

As they we're trying to sneak out of the village,Nizar accidently step on a twig.Which makes a slight noise.Then,the creatures came rushing towards them.

Faiz:Aw you fucking bafoon!RUNNNN!!!

They were running as fast as they could.Then,they spotted a dark cave.

Nizar:INTO THAT CAVE!

They went into the cave.But,the creatures seems to be afraid of it.They yelped,and ran away.

Faiz:Hah!What pussies.Afraid of a dark cave.
Nizar:I dont know.But I have a bad feeling about this.
Faiz:Who caaarresssssssss?We're still alive!And thats that.Lets go deeper.We might find some food in there.
Nizar:Okay.
Nizar:Stay close.
Faiz:Yeah yeah.

As they went deeper,it gets darker.Later on,Faiz realised that he got seperated with Nizar.

Faiz:Nizar?Niiiizzaaarrr?
Faiz:Okay man.This aint funny.Where are you?
Faiz:Niiiizzaaaaaarrr??
Faiz:WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOUUUUU!?
Faiz:Man.This place give me the creeps.

Then,faiz smell a sweet aroma.

Faiz:*sniff sniff* Aw god that smells like--...That smells like...*saliva coming out of his mouth* COOOOOKIIIIEEESSSSSSS!!!!

Faiz rushed towards the smell like a warthog.

Faiz:Oink!OIIINNNKKK!

Then,he spotted a jar of cookies.

Faiz:Mmmmmm....Coookiesssss.*takes the jar of cookies*

He spotted a peice of paper.

Faiz:Eh,what the crap is this?''Belongs to Rafaee.Do NOT take.''
Faiz:Yeah like I give a shit.
Faiz:*eats* Damn these are delicious.

Then,he heard a voice behind him.He turned around,but no one was there.He heard the voice again.It sounded like a guy was masturbating.

???:Uhhhh....Uhhhhhhhhh~
???:I want to suck you dick.
Faiz:What the fuck?
Faiz:Where are you?SHOW YOURSELF!
Rafaee:I've been dead for centuries.And I love your cock.
Faiz:*screams* GHOST!COCKSUCKING GHOOOOSSSTTTT!

Faiz ran as fast as he could.But he ran into a dead end.

Faiz:*pant,pant* I think *pant,pant* I've lost him.

Then,he heard a voice right beside his ears.

Rafaee:I wanna stick my weener in your butt.
Faiz:AAHHHWHWHW!!!!!!!!SHOW YOURSELF!!!!

Then,a ghost appeared.He's wearing a white cloth and his hair was very long.His nails is long as tree branches.His teeth,as sharp as a walrus.He came nearer to Faiz.

Rafaee:Skoopidy-doop-doop-boo!
Faiz:HOLY SHIT!NIZAARR!WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOUU!?
Faiz:*whimpers* Pleasseeeeee.Please!What do you want?
Rafaee:I want some cookies and a dick!
Faiz:You can take my cookies!BUT YOU WONT TAKE MY DICK!
Rafaee:I dont think you understand.I've been dead for centuries.So how do you think I feel?

[Circkets]

Faiz:What?
Rafaee:Everytime a person comes into this cave,I would take advantage of them.
Faiz:What?NO!NOOOOO!
Rafaee:Are you ready for my spooky cock?>:)
Faiz:NO!NOT THE SPOOKY COCK!
Rafaee:Prepare to feel centuries of penetration!
Faiz:HELL NO!NIZAR!HELP MEEE!

As he was trying to run,the ghost held Faiz's legs.And he fell down to the ground.The ghost pulled down his zip using his mouth.

Rafaee:Rawr.
Faiz:NO!NO NO NO NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
Rafaee:It's raping timmmeee!
Faiz:No!NO!Dont stick that in there!NO!NOOOOO!Ah-- Hey,wait a second.Ah it's not all that bad.I dont feel anything.I dont feel anything at all!I think I might do a crossword puzzle.Yeaaahhhhhh.

Then,Nizar walks in.And spotted Faiz.

Nizar:WHAT THE -BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP-



Advice:Dont ever let anyone take advantage of you......Unless you want to :)



To Be Continued....

Chapter Four:The Tribe

Akram:*wakes up* Ughh...Damn it...Why do they always have to start with the head...

His vision was blur at the moment.Then he realised that his wrist was tied up against a tree.

Akram:*struggles*Ah shit.*struggles harder*
????:That wont do any good.
Akram:Huh?

Akram looks beside him and notice there is a man in a torn up clothes,who was also tied up against a tree.

Akram:Who are you?
????:My name is Azlan.I am a researcher.(note:Azlan is my eldest brother)
Akram:What brings a bloke like you into this part of the world?
Azlan:I am hired by a guy named Osama.He brought me here to do some research on some--
Akram:Okay can you skip to the part to how you ended up like this?
Azlan: ...Well I found out that Osama was up to no good.I overheard him saying that he's going to kill all of his workers once their done doing their part of the job.So I--
Akram:*yawn*
Azlan: ...So I ran away from headquarters.And the last thing I knew,something hitted me on the head and I passed out.
Azlan:*sigh* Crawl out of one hole,and into another -_-.
Akram:Bad luck,ol' chum.
Azlan:So how did you ended up here?
Akram: ...Not worth mentioning.
Azlan:O..kay.
Azlan:Great.Here comes the big ''Cheese''.
Akram:Eh?

Then came a big,furry,naked creature.Akram thought it was a human tiger.But ''it'' dosent have a tail.But it does have an anus.So it must be a human.The human came nearer to Akram.

Akram:Oh my god...I think im going to puke with that anus dangling in front of me.
????:Porche oot ekk jar Akmal.Plivio este bien lollolol pornhubbo questa?(My name is Akmal,Cheif of this tribe.What brings you outsiders to our Island?)
Akram:What the fuck is he talking about?
Azlan:He said he is the cheif.Dont worry.Let me handle this.I can speak their language.
Akram:Thank god.
Azlan(In his mind):[Im sorry,mate.But I have to use you to get out of this situation]
Azlan:*Foreign language*(My name is Azlan.I come in peace.I came here to warn you.There is a man here named Osama.He seeks to steal your land.)

Some of the people up the trees started to grunt and snort.

Akram:Okay.They look a bit pissed off there.
Azlan:Shush.Let me handle this.Just look at the Cheif's eye fiercely.
Akram:Why?
Azlan:Trust me!

Akram looked at the cheif's eye fiercely.Which caught the cheif's attention.His blood begins to boil.

Akmal:(How dare he look at me that way.I should cut off his eyes.)
Azlan:(As you can see,this son of a bitch beside me,is working for Osama.He is one of his top assasins.)

Then,the creatures started to turn wild.Some of them even roared.

Akram:Okay that dosent look good.
Azlan:(Oh god!He just said he pissed on your ancestors grave!)

The creatures are jumping up and down.They seemed very angry.

Akram:Okay they look very pissed off now.
Azlan:(He said he is going to rape your mom in front of your very eyes!)
Akram:Okay stop talking.Your making it worse.
Azlan:(He said he is going to burn your homes!)
Akram:OKAY STOP!
Azlan:(HE SAID FUCK YOUUUUUUUU!)

That really does it.The cheif and his tribe are at their limit.

Akmal:Lorque ke morissa sallamakar ho!
Azlan:He said he is going to fight you.
Akram:Oh hell no...Tell him I refuse.
Azlan:(He said he's going to dance on your grave when he's done with you)

The cheif cuts off both of their ropes on their wrist.

Akmal:(Im gonna make you bleed!)
Azlan:Guess he really does want to fight you.
Akram:Shit....


Let the madness begin...


To be Continued.

Chapter Three:Lost.

Near the coast.

Akram:Ohhh maannnnn...My head...
Akram:I wonder what happenned...

Akram spotted Faiz on top of Nizar.Their both unconcious.

Akram:Wake up.Hey wake up.*slaps*
Faiz:Ow!Sheesh man.I was dreaming that I was eating a roasted turkey.
Nizar:Ugghhhh...My head...Where are we?
Akram:I have no idea.
Nizar:Where are the others?
Faiz:Oh my god...You guys might wanna see this.

Faiz pointed at something near the rocks.Akram and Nizar couldn't see it clearly.So they went closer and realised that it was the captain.Her head was splattered all over the rocks.And her brains was coming out of her head like ooze.And muzzy was spotted near the coconut tree.His head must've bumped the coconut tree and all the coconuts fell and crushed his head to bits.

Akram:Shiiiitttt.What a mess.
Faiz:So what are we going to do now?
Nizar:Im starving.How about we feast on the corpses?The fat one looks delicious *points at muzzy*
Akram:Good idea.

So they gathered firewood near the jungle.Nizar skinned both of them with his knife.Then,Faiz started roasting them.

Faiz:Dinner's ready!

They feasted on their flesh.

Nizar:Mmmm...That was good.
Akram:Okay is it just me,or do I feel like someone is watching us in the jungle.
Faiz:Well I dont see anyone there *looks at the jungle*
Nizar:Thats because their not there.Their up at the trees. *points*

They saw a group of naked human.Their bodies are full with hair.Their eyes watching fiercely at them.

Faiz:*Looks up* Oh.
Faiz:I think this is the time when we should be running.
Nizar:I say we stand and fight!
Akram:Are you fucking nuts?We lost our weapon when we were drowning in the sea.
Nizar:Shiiiiiiiiiiittttt.
Nizar:I still got my knife though.
Akram:Okay those guys are huge.You expect to kill them with that little knife?
Nizar:Hmmm good point.

Those creatures jumped off the tree and starts running towards them.

Akram:ENOUGH TALK!RUN RUNNNNNNN!!!

They started running.But those creatures was faster.

Nizar:DAMN THESE NIGGAS ARE FAST!
Faiz:*pant pant* I CANT *pant pant* KEEP UP!
Akram:CMON!YOU CAN DO IT,BABY BOY!

Unfortunately,they have caught Faiz.

Faiz:AHHH SHIIITT!GO ON WITHOUT ME!RUN!
Akram:YEAH THE HELL WE WILL.
Faiz:WAIT! I WAS KIDDING!I WAS TRYING TO SOUND HEROIC!COME BAAAAAACK!
Nizar:I knew he was going to say that.

The wierd human-like creatures knocked Faiz's head on the ground.Faiz passed out.

Akram:Oh you sons of a bitches are so dead!NO ONE DOES THAT TO MY MATE!

Akram punched one of them.And all of them started piling him and knocked him stone cold.

Nizar:*Stuttering* Hey g-g-guys.Can we settle this like gentlemens?I mean,t-t-there is n-n-no need for violence.

One of them came up front to Nizar and kicked him at the nuts.

Nizar:OOF!JESUS CHRISSSSTTTTTTTT!!!
Nizar:* in pain* That.........Was dirty.......*passed out*

The creatures started the roar and pounding their chests like Tarzan.They picked up their bodies and brought them back to the village.What will happen to our brave heroes??



To be Continued....

Chapter Two:Crash

Inside the ship.

Faiz:Ohhh mannn.I cant take this shit any longer.Are we there yet?
Akram:No.
Faiz:How bout now?
Akram:No.
Faiz:How bout now?
Akram:No.
Faiz:Now?
Akram:Shut up.

The captain came out of the cabin.

Aisyah:I have some bad news which might give a shock to you all.
Nizar:Hah!Lay it on me,ho.Nothing in this world can scare me.
Aisyah:Well we are completely lost.And we're almost out of ration.We've only enough ration for a six day trip.And it's been eight days now,if you guys hadnt noticed.If my calculation is right,we've only got 2 days left to find the island.Or it's no food for us.
Nizar: ...
Nizar:NOOOOOO!IM GONNA STARRRRVVVEEEEEEEEE!
Faiz:JESUS CHRIST,MAN!
Akram:Eh?What did you just say?
Faiz:I SAID JESUS CHRIST MAN!WE'RE GOING TO STARVE!
Akram:What in the fuck does that mean?
Faiz:I dont know.It just came out of my mouth for no apparent reason.

Up at the watchtower.

Muzzy:Hello.I wonder what's that thing on the horizon.

Muzzy took out his scope.He saw an Ice Berg.His voice begins to shake.

Muzzy:C-c-c-cap-cap-captain!
Aisyah:What did you see,my boy?
Muzzy:*SCREAMS* ICE BERG STRAIGHT AHEAD~!
Aisyah:What tha fuck?
Aisyah:ALL HANDS ON DECK!HARD-A-STARBOARD!LOOSEN THE SAILS!EVERYONE,TO YOUR STATIONS!

Everyone started to panic and looked at each other.

Akram:Wait.What are we supposed to do?There are only five of us.Plus I dont know how to navigate a ship.Im not that sailor kind type of guy.
Faiz:Me too.
Nizar:Me three.

(Crickets)

Aisyah: ...God help us -_-
Aisyah:Hold on tight!

While everyone was holding a pole with all their might,Faiz was busy eating the rations.

Akram:What the--?HOW CAN YOU STILL BE EATING AT A TIME LIKE THIS?!
Faiz:This might be the last *scrunch* food im going to eat!I dont know *gulp,scrunch* if we're going to survive this!

He eats greedily.And he picked up a bucket filled with water on the floor and starting to drink it.

Faiz:*gulp,gulp*
Nizar:Oh my fucking god.Dude,do you actually know what your drinking?
Faiz:*gulp,gulp* No,what? *gulp,gulp*
Nizar:That bucket is for spitting.So your drinking other people's spits.
Faiz:BLAUGGHH!!!*Pukes*

They came nearer to the ice berg.

Aisyah:HERE IT COMEESSSS!!
Akram,Nizar,Faiz:HOLY SHHHHIIIII--

CRASH!KAPEWLABOW!!!

To be Continued...

Chapter One:A voyage to the LadeeDa Isle

In the year of 213,564 B.C(before caesar)

Once upon a time,in a small village,there lived our three adventurers.Akram the Human from the West,Nizar the Orc from the Middle East,and Faiz the Pig from the Middle of Nowhere.Akram,an expert swordsman.Nizar,a brutal warrior.And Faiz...Well,no comment.Our tale starts when Faiz,was shitting in the forest.

Faiz:Ohh yeahh baby.Thats a big one.Owhhhh.*farts*Oh boy here it comes!!!AHHHH!

A big poop about the size of 15 curex come out of his dirty ass.Suddenly,an Imperial guard passed by.

Guard:Oi!No shitting at the forest!Pay the court a fine or serve your sentence.
Faiz:Ah shut up,you marxist bastard.I dont even have a penny on me.
Guard:Then pay with your blood!

The guard draws out his sword.Faiz shitted in his pants.His legs was shaking.And then,out came Nizar from the middle of nowhere,sliced the guard's head off with a giant war axe.

Nizar:YEAAAARRRRGGHHHHH!!!
Guard:Blaburbraburburururb..(Dies)

Nizar looks at Faiz.

Nizar:Blimey,thats one big shit.
Faiz:What do you expect?I've been holding it for 3 months now.
Nizar:Why didnt you just shit at the safehouse?
Faiz:Yeah right,like the toilet drain was big enough to flush my shit.
Nizar:Good point.

After they buried the dead body,they went back to the safehouse.When they arrived,they saw Akram,who was reading a letter from the King.

Akram:Hey you bunch of low-lives.Pack all your stuff.The king ordered us to look for survivors at a mysterious Island.They hadnt return after scouting around the island.
Faiz:Oh for crying out loud.Couldn't they find someone els--
Akram:The king offered us 50,000 gold and 5 prostitutes a year for the rest of our life if we go there and report back.

There was a quick silence.

Faiz & Nizar:THEN WHAT THE FUCK ARE WE WATING FOR!?

They all packed their weapons and armors and rations.And then they went to the docks,waiting for the captain at the meeting place,who is 2 hours late.

Akram,Nizar,Faiz:*sigh*
Faiz:It's been nearly 2 hours now.IM HUNGRRRYYYY!!
Nizar:Shut up and wait,you greedy pig.
Faiz:Oho just because im a pig,dosent make me greedy,you greenish fiend.
Nizar:Why I oughta--

Then a girl came running towards them.And then stopped,to catch her breath.

????:Sorry im late,fellas.
Akram:Who are you?
Aisyah Mustapha:Why,Im the captain!My name is Aisyah Mustapha.The king ordered me to send you fine gentlemens to the so called ''Mysterious Island'' and return to report and claim my reward.50,000 gold and 5 manwhores a year,for the win?

Akram,Nizar and Faiz were surprised.They were expecting a captain to be more....Well,more.

Akram:Well im glad.Let me introduce ourselves.I am Akr--
Aisyah:Yeah I know your names.
Akram:O...kay.

Akram heard Faiz and Nizar was giggling at the back.

Akram:Shut up. -_-
Aisyah:Oh yeah!Is it okay if I bring my servant along?He can carry your luggages.Pretty useful.
Nizar:Sounds good.
Aisyah:Okay.
Aisyah:*screaming at the top of her lungs* YARR!COME DOWN E'RE U MISERABLE FAGGOT!

Then,a fat boy came running down the stairs.He thumbled off and landed on his head.

Muzzy:OW!EEK!YOW!AHH!ARRGGHHHH!

They all laugh except for Aisyah.

Aisyah:For once,can you be a bit more careful?
Muzzy:Sorry,miLady.Sniff Sniff.(Burst out crying)
Aisyah:*Whispers* He's a bit emotional.Try not taunting him a lot.
Faiz:Really?He's really that emotional?Let me give it a try.

Faiz walked up the muzzy and gave him a hand.

Muzzy:Thank you.
Faiz:Your welcome.

(crickets)

Faiz:You suck.
Muzzy:*CRIES OUT LOUD* WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!

Then,Faiz walks back to Aisyah.

Faiz:Oh im soooo gonna enjoy this.
Aisyah:Okay.This is going to be a three day journey.All aboard!Muzzy dont stand there like a bunch of lemons.Place the luggage into the ship!
Muzzy:Right away,ma'am.

The Journey Begins....






TO BE CONTINUED

Short story!

I feel like making a short story.Concerning about my friends :).It's going to be one hell of an adventure.

A song for my pet:Cleo

This is a song for my pet,Cleo(Short for Cleopatra).Aisyah asked me to do this :) so lots of thanks to her for giving me an idea for my new blog.The title of this song is going to be ''Go Cleo!''.Ah if only my pet could watch this X).Here goes:

Ah ah yeah,
My pets' name is Cleo,
She looks like a negro,

She has a cute face,
But quite a little taste,

She has six tits,
And her butt really stinks!

She has a hot body,
But it's so oily and sloppy,

She has a wet nose,
And she knows how to pose,

She is always depressed,
And she is such little pest,

She really likes to fret,
But heck!She's my pet!

Go Cleo!
Ah Ah,
Go Cleo!
Oh oh,
Go Cleo!
OOOOOOooo yeaaahhhhhhh....(slow and groovy voice)

I hope you guys enjoyed it :).

My Friends.

Okay I dont have any idea for a good blog but some certain ''person'' demanded me make one about my friends.Hehe well I cant disappoint my fans :P.Lets start with:

Nizar:
A noob.He always take half of my food everyday at recess.For once cant you buy your own food?:) But what the heck,he also shares some of his(sometimes).Good mate.Almost have the same interest as mine.

Muzhaffar:
GAY GAY GAY GAY GAY GAY GAY ROFLROFLROFLROFL LOLAOLAOALAOLLOAOLOL

Faiz:
So called monitor in my class this year.Lack of attention in English class and others.Always got scold by the Mathematics teacher,Puan Eliza.Patience my friend,patience.

Akmal:
Skinny like a boney macaroni.You need hair rebonding :).Good fellow.Very helpful.

Bidin:
Has a REALLY REALLY REAAAAALLLYY black skin.You can hardly see him at night.Always make lame jokes and sometimes talks to himself lollololololol.There there,dont be ashamed of yourself.

Azim Bawang:
Everytime he walk past me I can always smell onions.*sniff sniff* Damn I can smell it here too.

Hamzah:
A shy fellow.Always blur,and needs a kick up the boot :P.Nice person.Always asking for my Game I.D -.-

Hakim Sushi:
You sound like a fuckin duck lol.When are you going to have your pubirtyyyyy?

Well I cant think up of anyone else so im sorry if I didnt put your name in here.Lets move on to girls :)

Shafinaz:
My good mate when I was standard 1,2,3.She always hangs out with me.Nicest girl :).Good looking too.She looks like an American.I cant see her again because I moved to Kajang -_-.I have her msn though.We always chat.

Husniyah:
A little girl with a big girl's voice lol.Ooo you dont wanna mess with her when she gets mad >.> But she's always calm and very artistic.I like her drawings.

Aliya Farida:
Ah this girl is so sweet.Always say im cute :).

Aisyah:
Known her since standard six.She was nice back then,I dont know what happenned to her now lol.No offense.Good mate.

Sam:
She's Chinese.She's cool.Very fun to be with.A bit retarded as well,but thats what I like about you :).

Okay I guess thats it lol I have no idea who else to think of @_@.I hope you guys had fun reading my blog.

Hmm testing,testing.

What I did on Valentines day

Hey guys.

This is what I did on Valentines day.

Well I dropped my great grandmother in my cousin's house first for a few days.Because me and my family are probably gonna stray out till 12 midnight or something.My dad bought two move tickets :P .We watched it at Pavilion.The first movie was Slumdog Millionare.Nah it's not that bad.The bad thing about that movie is,that it's DISGUSTINNNGGGG.This kid right,was stuck in a fucked up bathroom that there are only two exits.Through the door,and the through the SHIT DUMP.Okay so this little kid's older brother,Salim,locked his lil brother,Jamal, in the bathroom because he made him lost his customer.And then,Ametabh Bachan(The indian actor i think you guys know him.)suddenly appeared for no fucking reason.So this kid,Jamal,was a big fucking fan of his.So guess how he got out of the bathroom?Yeah you guessed it.THROUGH THE SHIT DUMP!He was covered with shit when he got out.GOD WTF I WAS EATING THAT TIME!I NEARLY PUKED.But anyway,the movie was pretty touching.I felt sorry for Salim lol.He died at the ending.6 bullets on his ass rofl.Now lets go on the the second movie.Hmm Valkyrie.Well the movie is pretty good.But I like the part when Tom Cruise got shot by 10 soldiers rofl.His last words were ''LONG LIVE SACRED GERMANY'' and RAT TAT TAT TAT TAT!Owned.You know what I mean.

And after i watched the movie,I was searching for this game.Heck i've been searching for it everywhere.The game is ''The Elder Scrolls IV:Oblivion''.It's been a few years now.God im so disappointed.There arent any Game Stores that sells original PC games anymore.Everytime I find a crappy game store,they sell pirated CD's.Omg wtf?CMONN MALAYSIA!WHERE THE FUCK CAN I FIND A FUCKIN GOOD GAME STORE?So anyway =.= if you guys happen to find a good game store,I'd REAALLLYYYY appreciate if you give me the exact location.Oh yeah after that,my and my family ate dinner at Madam Kwan.Hmm I love the Fried Rice.Bit salty though.

Well thats all for now.I dont have any ideas.I wish i'd get to date someone on valentines =.=.THE WORLD IS SO CRUEELLL.Ah well.That is what I did on Valentines Day.